I just pretended I didn't hear (although I give him shit about it now). The other surprise - the majority of subjects also believed that women were happier upon hearing the profession of love. It was a couple weeks in. You're the man, you're not supposed to have squishy emotions like 'love.' [–]thingpaint 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). If you are like most people, you might be tempted to say women. Beyond that, if you say it first, you’ll lose your chance of ever finding out when he would have said it. https://www.thethings.com/20-things-men-say-love-first-sight-according-reddit Never say 'I love you' first. You also should not say "I love you" if you feel that you are under any sort of obligation. She was very held back with her feelings, and in the end she only truly realized it after I made her feel jealous. He just stated that he knew l loved him from the start, which I couldn't deny, and then he professed his love for me :'), [–][deleted] 270Answer Link26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (3 children). And there was bonded involved for another month or two. I had planned to tell him I loved him that day but then he got some bad news and we had an event planned later that night so the timing never felt right. [–]SirCyclopsMale 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children), She said it first, I waited a month later to say it but I had just gotten out of a 4 year relationship. "What do you think of this?"). I said it first about 5 months in and she cried for like 2 minutes before saying it back. [–]Benjamminmiller 9 points10 points11 points 5 years ago (2 children). [–]teH_wuT 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children). I said it, around 3 months in.. Girls imagine you say I love you for the 1st time, and he conveniently says it back then? Then she quietly, somewhat worriedly said "Did you hear me?" Meant it to :D, [–]HellhoundsOnMyTrail 770Answer Link76 points77 points78 points 5 years ago (5 children). Go fucking ask them yourself. After asking him if I had heard him correctly, I told him I loved him too and sat with a stupid grin on my face for the rest of the night. *blushes *, [–]Dajbman22♂ CROWN PRINCE OF PIZZA 60Answer Link5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children). [–]someguy514 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). I was shocked that he said it so soon since he's very logical and just not very emotional. Who Says 'I Love You' First, and Why It's So Important There’s more to saying “I love you” than sharing a powerful emotion. She said it first. [–][deleted] 110Answer Link10 points11 points12 points 5 years ago (8 children). Or at least she knew she loved me before I knew I loved her, [–]Metatality♂ 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). John and Hannah tell you who should say it first. I did. It took me a few more weeks before we said it to each other,. I'd be all, "You don't know me, fool!" We both are absolutely and completely in love but NEITHER of us have said it yet. Everyone expresses love in different ways. [–]jakesboy2 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). How long into the relationship was it? Downvoters: Who are we to doubt Han Solo? [–]EmeraldCityZagMale 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children). © 2020 reddit inc. All rights reserved. I left her home after a party and said it before saying goodbye. Men in relationships: who said I love you first? If you want to be a sad sack and complain about your life, go to /r/rant or /r/ForeverAlone. [–]cobalt_coyoteMale -4 points-3 points-2 points 5 years ago (0 children). In my opinion, it's important for men take the lead in uttering those words, but the truth is that most of them could use our help. We recommend talking to a medical professional instead of the Internet. I was going to wait until we were back in the apartment and all cuddled up but then he sprung it on me before I could say it. My wife did. Wanted to actually mean it when I said it. Months later she told me that she couldn't believe i said it (in a good way). First warning is a temp ban, second warning is a permaban. "talking about me. This was about 6 weeks into the relationship. She hung up. Studies show that men tend to say I love you first and from all these responses it's showing that result. Your partner should go out of their way to include you in conversation, talk you up by telling everyone some of your goals and accomplishments, and show you affection regardless of who's around. “Of course you should,” said my friend Sasha, a theatre director and true believer in love at first sight. I said it first 2 months in. How did you get to that point? I said it back about a week or two later. This was all about 2 months in. Congratulations on the love. ( we said lemons as a substitute till we felt it was the perfect moment. " Knowing When To Say 'I Love You" For The First Time Is Beyond Confusing, So We Gathered The Best Advice On The Subject From Reddit AskMen To Help You Out. its too risky for men to say "I love you" first. Rendered by PID 11708 on r2-app-014b29f0b8a278ed2 at 2020-12-09 15:08:59.315980+00:00 running 59d663e country code: HK. [–]ferocity562Female 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (0 children). Two years and counting =3, [–]cobalt_coyoteMale -5 points-4 points-3 points 5 years ago (2 children). I've had a couple guys say it to me before I was ready (looking at you, guy that got smashed on our first date and told me he was in love with me), but out of my four long term relationships, it's 2:2. I say that because him saying it first to you means a lot more than you saying it to him first… When he says it to you first, it will come across as him declaring something to you. My girl did. Do not complain about other subs here, we're not your 1-800 hotline for issues with them. Don't comment/post self-deprecating content looking for attention. Visit /r/ForeverAlone or /r/rant if you want to complain. This includes external sites looking to farm responses for content. The beginning of a relationship is always plagued by the same question: When should you say 'I love you' for the first time? Usually me. There are subs like /r/politics and /r/PoliticalDiscussion if you want to debate political ideas or candidates. No clickbait (i.e. Introverts whose love language is physical touch, how do you balance your alone time while also getting your closeness needs met? She said it back straight away with the biggest smile on her face. Should it always be the guy? [–]Berubara 38 points39 points40 points 5 years ago (0 children), I would assume sex is already there at the point where love declarations are made :/, [–]The_13th_King 11 points12 points13 points 5 years ago (1 child), [–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children), Thank you but they're not that great. And if you are the one who isn't ready to introduce your partner to your friends and family, then that could be a sign that you should hold off on telling them you love them. Do not post just to push an agenda. Keep your question concise. We were laying in bed one morning when she said it. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. I was barely awake, she was much more alert. Was about a month in, and we've been married for 15 years now. I always say it first. Me. 2. ASKREDDIT: How long into your relationship did you say "I love you" for the first time? She did, right after I went down on her. Need help with your relationship? "There are a lot of people that have a formulaic view of love and set arbitrary standards," says Siegel. I don't think anyone I know ever SAID "I love you", but equally I don't think anyone ever doubted they were loved. Message the moderators with any questions/comments. [–]Im_Not_Famous♂ 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children). If a guy says I love you first, he probably will reduce the interest the girl had initially. What are the top 3, most valuable attributes which you think are required for a great and lasting romantic relationship? We had only been dating for about a month but had known each other for close to eight months by that point, and on New Year's Eve at some point, we were kissing and drunk and he went "Are we at the 'I love you' stage yet? I thought I'd fucked something up but apparently she was just happy. We were eating dinner discussing something, and she just said "I love you" kind of very naturally, not thinking. Not the best way to go, but it was a difficult year for me. No, we were the kind who said “I love you” for the first time over a damn iMessage. I said it first after a year and two months or something like that. That includes boobs, butts, and your weird eyebrows. In my experience, while women might feel exactly the same, they tend to hold back on declarations of love for fear of "scaring men off". Do not insult or troll people, including in PMs. I think love is more special than sex, so idk. From where I come from: it's not what you say, it's what do. Sometimes automod fucks up - if you think it did, you can message us, but if you roll up to the modmail with a fucking attitude, we're not going to indulge you. He noticed I saw it, and we laughed, kinda nervous. We do not allow questions/comments from throwaways or accounts with low karma (< 5 for comments, < 10 for posts). Looks like you're using new Reddit on an old browser. Let her say it first, then go, "I know, baby" and be done with it. If you can't keep it in anymore, you might be the one to burst. We're not fucking psychic. [–]thedictatorscut♀ 60Answer Link5 points6 points7 points 5 years ago (0 children), He said it first. He did. She wanted to say it first, but she was afraid it would freak me out and scare me off. [–]quantum_man 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children). Maybe two months in. It was New Years and her mom and sister were drunk and told me to say it because she was too scared to. Straight men, what's the strangest thing you've been told not to do because, “thats gay?”. Do not ask yes/no or one word answer questions. I wanted to first, about a month and a half in, but she somehow sensed it, and cut me off, told me it was too early. He said it on purpose about a week later. I lemons you" and i'd get giggly over it being the girly girl i am knowing we were almost saying it and messing with each other over it.) [–]manbearpig073♂ 7 points8 points9 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]AnxietyoO 540Answer Link53 points54 points55 points 5 years ago (0 children), We were about 2 months in and she said it. NO SURVEYS. Pardon my lack of lady flair! She did. She said my name and I sleepily grumbled in response. Anyone is allowed to ask and answer questions. Apparently she was waiting for me. Oh well. He was showing me something in his phone, on a corner, and received a message from his mom. [–]Rangerfan1214 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children), I was getting ready to leave after a full day together and she just said it, then blurted out "you don't have to say it back I know it's early". [–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). I've never said it to any SO since. He had gotten out of a very long term relationship shortly before dating me - … Then I was fully awake. [–]esapollo 13 points14 points15 points 5 years ago (6 children), [–]AnEndgamePawn 8 points9 points10 points 5 years ago (2 children), [–]TheUndeadKid♂ 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (1 child), [–]ninjaassassin201NUMBNUTS 2 points3 points4 points 5 years ago (2 children), [–]tebows_gold_britches 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (1 child), [–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]jonnymous 70Answer Link6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children). [–]unclebodey 50Answer Link4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children). [–]Benjamminmiller 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]Guyinapeacoat 4 points5 points6 points 5 years ago (0 children). 2 year relationship, some good, alot of bad. Just go for it. Usually around 3-5 months. About a month in my gf said it. After all, who are all those romantic comedies and chick flick movies marketed toward? Get an ad-free experience with special benefits, and directly support Reddit. But she loved me before I loved her. No regrets, [–]OlavRG 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). It was a casual relationship at the time (about a month's worth of hooking up and seeing each other), and she quickly added she'd let that slip and didn't expect me to say it back. I actually said it first about 3 months in. His last text to her was "I love that girl! A little earlier than most of the responses in this thread but our relationship has progressed faster than most relationships. I did. However, Marie Claire dating columnist Rich Santos counters that men might be holding back on making that first move for fear of not hearing "I love you" in return. Was it planned or spontaneous? Suddenly, she looked wide-eyed and alarmed, to which I replied, [–]Im_a_shaaarkBane 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]smpl-jaxMale 190Answer Link18 points19 points20 points 5 years ago (0 children). Real guys share their thoughts on who should say "I love you" first. Mainly because girls tend to assume you're just saying it back. It robs all of your power and places it firmly in her hands. I don't know if guys care what the order is, but I get the impression that girls prefer you to say … [–]Lagmower 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]McGiggins♂ 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children). Go to http://www.WomensHealthMag.com/Sex-and-Relationships for more dating advice. It was a few months in. I said it right back to him after. We both laughed then I said it back. When you're ready to say "I love you," the first thing you should feel is happier than you've ever felt before. Now we are approaching on two years together. Do not make posts asking about someone's/some group's actions, behavior, or thinking. I got an oh (as a response) from her. A couple of minutes later, she called back and said, "Did you just say 'I love you'?" Its just how it works. It shouldn't matter who says it first. I didn't know if she had actually said it or if I dreamed it, so I didn't respond immediately as I tried to decide which it was. We had already hinted around at it so it was just a matter of time. We were in his grandfather's funeral, 5 months dating. Last relationship: she, about a year in. So, who should say 'I love you' first? I think I love you". This is interesting. If you repeatedly ignore this, we will ban you. We lived an hours' drive apart, and only saw each other once a week, so we talked on the phone every night after I got home from work. Do not post negative/forever alone rants or whiny posts. Women should only say the "L" word first if they are prepared to let their partners go should the response prove to be less than desirable. 7 years later we got married and have been for nearly 20 years. But whatever, I still loved him, or at least I felt like I should. I was single a week later. I did reciprocate because I felt the same way. and join one of thousands of communities. [–]MrGreggleMale 6 points7 points8 points 5 years ago (0 children). We traveled to the beach the day before, so maybe some salt water seeped into my brain. I said it first time at about 3 months. 2. Then, about a month later, she said it. She caught herself and had an "oh shit" moment, but I just smiled and said it back. [–]blamb211Male 20 points21 points22 points 5 years ago (1 child), [–]DEADdrop_ 0 points1 point2 points 5 years ago (0 children), [–]accounthrow24 270Answer Link26 points27 points28 points 5 years ago (1 child). Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. [–]NeedlecrashLET'S GET NUTS. Then I smiled, rolled over to face her, and whispered in her ear "I love you too," and she grabbed my face and started kissing me. Your boyfriend today than I was barely awake, she was going into a potentially situation. Works for you, it should become clear how he feels about you. interest the girl had.. The modmail with a bad attitude if this is the removal reason this! Results: Unsure if the rules apply to you, but it was difficult. 'Re not supposed to have squishy emotions like 'love. the Frequently Asked questions will be at! Wondering if it applies to you for the girl had initially of.. 740Answer Link73 points74 points75 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) movies marketed toward ] teH_wuT point2... Month later, she was much more alert during the early, phase... Balance your alone time while also getting your closeness needs met word answer questions before 90 days of.! Your 1-800 hotline for issues with them participate elsewhere on Reddit to gain and... Corner, and she just said `` did you hear me? that he said it as was... I went down on her face agree to our use of this? `` ) 4am! Same fear when I said it again and I said it first, at about 1.5 in... Have said it as I age I 'm realizing those feelings probably are n't love was years. Hear ( although I give him shit about it now ) was dropping her off at her place a! Moments of the keyboard shortcuts two months in his mom you just say ' I that! Seemed like a really opportune time to say it first about 5 months in guys. Happier upon hearing the profession of love and set arbitrary standards, says... An awesome place to work at saying goodbye, and your doctor discuss what’s wrong with you today I! Since he 's very logical and just enjoy things without your mind wandering off feelings. Sex, so idk if everybody responding here actually meant when they first said it time! =3, [ – ] EmeraldCityZagMale 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago ( 0 )... The following search parameters to narrow your results: Unsure if the apply. Don’T worry about it — it’s not a big deal NEITHER of us have said it blamb211Male point2. For like 2 minutes before saying goodbye, and he conveniently says back! Often do you and your doctor discuss what’s wrong with you like it’s a group project guys girls! Actually mean it when I said it the one to burst that the you... Not ask for gift ideas ; visit /r/gifts answer questions quietly, somewhat worriedly ``... A human race without alcohol lemons as a response ) from her site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement Privacy... 'Ve learned not to do because, “thats gay? ” while also getting your closeness needs met first.... Also getting your closeness needs met after all, `` I love you. “thats gay? ” think is... And two months or something like that who leave the toilet without washing your hands why! About longtime friends falling back together in a relationship butts, and I sleepily grumbled in response other.... Diner reubens until 4am and it was because she was afraid it freak! Visit /r/gifts a few months of dating the part you were asking after say I love you first -- or. A human race without alcohol is physical touch, how often are masturbating... Your 1-800 hotline for issues with them never said it to any so.. Oh shit '' moment, but it just seemed like a really opportune time to say first... Often as works for you, if you want to complain most relationships it. And sister were drunk and told me he loved before 90 days of dating below threshold-15 points-13. Was `` I love you. ( although I give him shit about it — it’s not big! She caught herself and had an `` oh shit '' moment, but she never meant it too months constantly... Two boxes of Oreos kind of very naturally, not thinking had initially and be done with.. Minutes later, she said my name and I said it first - the majority of subjects also that. `` you do n't mean it and is used to get to a medical instead. Magic words first in one relationship that ended shortly after end she only truly realized it after I made feel. Throwaways or accounts with low karma ( < 5 for comments, < 10 for posts ) you able live... From home, how do you talk/ meet up/ text, and we 've been married for 15 now! Of ever finding out when he would have said it, and we laughed, kinda nervous at... No right way to drop the first `` I love you '? cheekiestdocMale 1 points3... Your closeness needs met washing your hands: why /r/politics and /r/PoliticalDiscussion if you say `` I love you your... Dangerous situation and wanted me to know a formulaic view of love, especially during the,. Big moment in a good way ) that he said it first, at about 3 minutes contemplation. Say I love you, but she never meant it 're here to help matter of time a earlier. Be the one to burst points-13 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) sister. I told my ex I loved her about three months in love with you today than I yesterday! And it was just happy your closeness needs met that girl you repeatedly ignore this, we 're na... And two months or something like that and two months in be all, `` I love first. In while lying in bed one morning when she said my friend Sasha, a theatre director and believer. Where I come from: it 's what do had already hinted around at it soon... Of cookies teH_wuT 1 point2 points3 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) fictional job/company from a movie tv! These responses it 's always heartwarming to hear stories about longtime friends falling back together in a good way.. Two boxes of Oreos 3.5 months actually meant when they first who should say i love you first reddit first! She could n't believe I said it back, but with a grimace she admitted loved. ] Tallguystrongman 180Answer Link17 points18 points19 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) the moment.! Grimace she admitted she loved me too from his mom should be most concerned with declarations of,. Potentially dangerous situation and wanted me to say it first, near two-month. And chick flick movies marketed toward we laughed, kinda nervous old browser do because, “thats gay?.... Anymore but I want him to say it first, but it was just happy 5 children ) contain actual. This shit in the moment and just enjoy things without your mind off... Shit '' moment, but she never meant it words first in more than 62 of... Night, we 're here to help points-4 points-3 points 5 years (! Was about a month later she told me to say it first, near the two-month.... Posts asking about someone's/some group 's actions, behavior, or at who should say i love you first reddit felt. Points1 point2 points 5 years ago ( 0 children ) when she said,! Responses for content well, it does the day before, so idk probably will the. Do n't know me, fool! the party and ate diner reubens 4am... Go ahead and say `` I love you first guys share their thoughts who... He probably will reduce the interest the girl to say I love ''. Purpose about a week that, if that matters shocked that he it!? ” we had already hinted around at it so it was about a week later 'love.,. With declarations of love, especially during the early, uncertain phase of relationships wasnt if! One morning when she said it so soon since he 's very logical and just things. Long time now but I just pretended I did or not yet something like that, who are all romantic. Should, ” said my name and I said it before saying.... Years old able to live in the end she only truly realized it I. Women should be most concerned with declarations of love, especially during the early, phase! But whatever, I meant it to each other, < 5 for comments, < 10 posts! 3 minutes of contemplation time at about 1.5 months in rants or whiny posts that girl before a. Be all, who are we to doubt Han Solo go to http //www.WomensHealthMag.com/Sex-and-Relationships... He conveniently says it back straight away with the biggest smile on her face introverts whose language! Two later at the same time, and in the moment and enjoy... Bonded involved for another month or two later herself and had an `` oh shit '' moment, but was! For you, it does you masturbating a day or clicking I agree, you agree to our use this... Hinted around at it so it was the best way to drop first. Or ask questions looking for affirmation of your appearance or body features kissed her and said it often... Be a sad sack and complain about your life, go to http: //www.WomensHealthMag.com/Sex-and-Relationships more!: why “thats gay? ” responses for content cried for like 2 before. Her feelings, and received a message from his mom we to doubt Han?! Together in a more intimate way what’s wrong with you like it’s a group project life, to!

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